Chasing Ghosts
by Mari Grem
Summary: They are the last three of the Marauders Legacy. He, a Marauder. She, his wife. And She, his best friend's fiance. They all seem to be utterly lost, atleast to this time period. Songfic!


**Disclaimer: Harry Potter is JK Rowling's. The song is Dashboard Confessional's.**

**A/N: Another songfic, I know, What about AEYSH? Well, the current chapter's a witch to write, so it's gonna take some time. Anyway, please review-Cole**

* * *

Hestia stared at the picture before him. It was the pictures of the 'Marauders' as her four favorite men had dubbed themselves. Well no, not anymore, three favorite men and that traitor, Peter Pettigrew. It was first thought that Remus was the traitor, followed by the thought of Sirius being the traitor, but it was truly Peter, that incompetent fool, who was the traitor and betrayed his only and dearest friends to Lord Voldemort.

Hestia's eyes rested on Remus Lupin, the only surviving Marauder and the love of her life. Fourteen years ago, when Lily and James were killed, Remus was left all alone, then he was given Sirius back, and now Sirius had been snatched from him again. This time it was permanent, Sirius was dead.

Remus had never lived an easy life. First it was the werewolf bite, than sixth year with Snape, then Lily and James' death, Harry's third year, and now this. Life had never been good to Remus and Lady Luck was rarely on his side. Remus was always optimistic, he had to be to survive this long, but sometimes it just got so hard, sometimes love was just not enough. Hestia had once asked Remus if he loved her, and he simply replied, "Only from love can love be begotten, if truly do you love me, than truly I can love you." Hestia had cried at that statement, knowing that he did love her, yet he was afraid to love. His parents had treated him fairly, even spoiled him, but that was only pity, only for show. Remus had never known true love until he met Hestia, and now he was afraid of the pain that may follow.

_I guess it's luck but it's the same  
Hard luck you've been trying to tame  
Maybe it's love but it's like you said  
"Love is like a role that we play"_

Even though Remus had been through everything, Hestia still believed in his favorite, living Marauder. Remus had done so much good to people who treated him like dirt. Hestia knew that Remus would be an important figure in this war, and she was willing to die for her true love, die for him if it meant he could fulfill his life's mission and carry on the Legacy of the Marauders.

And yet, there were times when Remus would get so angry with Hestia that she just wanted to smack him, to die. He was always so logical, so down to earth, that it scared her when he would snap. Sometimes the things he would say to her, especially when he told her how lonely he felt without his 'brothers', she would feel as if death would be welcomed by Remus had it wanted him.

_  
But I believe in you so much  
I could die for the words that you say  
But I believe in you so much  
I could die from the words that you say  
_

Hestia loved Remus with all her heart, but still she could not tell him that, could not take him back. Because he was still so miserable, he was still dwelling in the past. She would watch him at night as he slept, his photo album resting smoothly on his chest and wet tears still on his cheeks. Remus had been trying to bring them back forever; he never did let them go. He knew that by dwelling in the past, by trying to remember the good that once was, he would not have to deal with reality, not have to go through the pain that was right in front of him, slowly enveloping him.

_  
But you're chasing the ghost of a good thing  
Haunting yourself as the real thing  
Is getting away from you again  
While you're chasing ghosts_

Remus Lupin stared at the photograph in front of him. It was a picture of his five favorite women, Hestia, Lily, Emmaline, Paulina, Kirsti, and Kerina. Ginger was also in that picture, but she and Remus had never been very close, Ginger was a bit of a prep, and Remus just didn't like her.

Emma had just lost her fiancé, Remus knew that, and he understood her pain. Emma had been through so much, loosing her best friend, her boyfriend, and now her boyfriend again, this time to death. Lucky was not a word to describe his childhood friend.

Emma had once told Remus and James, while they were sitting on one of the tower balconies, that love meant nothing to the world, that no matter how much you love someone, you don't really love them because it all has to do with the book of the world. "We don't really fall in love," Emma had explained so many years ago, "We were destined to love each other, and always have."

_  
I guess it's luck but it's the same  
Hard luck you've been trying to tame  
Maybe it's love but it's like you said  
"Love is like a role that we play"_

Emma had told Remus so many times that she just wanted to give up. Remus always persuaded her not to, she was like a sister to him, and he would die for her.

And yet, she seemed to hate him sometimes. It was as if he was a constant reminder of everything that had been taken from her. Sometimes words hurt more than actions, sometimes love hurts more than hate.

_  
But I believe in you so much  
I could die for the words that you say  
But I believe in you so much  
I could die from the words that you say  
_  
Emma had never let go of the past, neither had Remus. They would always talk about their Hogwarts days. No matter how their conversation started out, it would always lead to the Marauders' Legacy, the last good thing that either could remember. They would talk and cry and laugh over the past while the present slowly slipped from their grasps. They always wanted to go back, always wanted a second shot. They were chasing the past, and they had no chance, but neither would ever believe that.

_But you're chasing the ghost of a good thing  
Haunting yourself as the real thing  
Is getting away from you again  
While you're chasing ghosts  
_  
Sometimes, Emmaline would sit up in bed, staring into space during the early morning hours, trying to figure out why life happened like this. She would spend hours contemplating how all of the events in her life fit into Fate's puzzle. She would bend and break every piece, trying to fit it into the puzzle, trying to figure out how it all added up. And every time, she would realize that it doesn't add up. Her life shouldn't of happened this way, it wasn't supposed to happen this way.

But it was destined to.

_Just bend the pieces til they fit  
Like they were made for it  
But they weren't meant for this  
No they weren't meant for this  
_

But it was destined to.

_  
Just bend the pieces til they fit  
Like they were made for it  
But they weren't meant for this  
_  
Hestia, Remus, and Emmeline were the only ones left of the Marauders' Legacy. And now, now Emma is dead leaving only Hestia and Remus, the broken screw-up and the werewolf. Hestia and Remus were now married, with children and grandchildren. They were old and gray and pretended to live the perfect life.

But still Remus would spend his nights crying, still Hestia would wake up screaming, still they would talk about the Marauders' Days as if they never ended, as if Sirius and James and Lily and Emma were right there with them. And it was as if they had never really lived life, because always they dwelled in the past, always they thought of what could have been and never of what was. They tried so hard to bring back the memories that they were enveloped within them never to resurface.

_Chasin' the ghost of a good thing  
Haunting yourself as the real thing  
Is getting away, away, away, away from you again  
_

And when Hestia died, and Remus was left all alone, he wasn't even there anymore. It was as if he lived only for those monthly transformations when he could roll up into a harmless wolf and remember the days of the dog, the stag, the rat, and the werewolf. Remus would spend days at a time locked in his room with nothing but photo albums and memories to keep him company.

Almost everyone had given up on him, but still Harry would visit. Everyday, with out fail, the son of the Marauders would be there to talk to Remus, to keep him sane, or as sane as he was able to be. And ever night, when Harry left, he would cry silver tears of sorrow because Remus had never grown up; he lived in the past and stayed as a teenager. He was living in a world of ghosts, where memories were events and letters were conversations and pictures were real.

_  
Chasin' the ghost of a good thing  
Haunting yourself as the real thing  
Is getting away from you again  
While you're chasing ghosts_

Remus Lupin died six years after his wife. On his gravestone, it was written:

"...May you finally find the people you have lost. Find the souls that were taken. For death is love's greatest cost."


End file.
